Asgardian babysitters
by delicate-storm
Summary: Daddies Tony Stark and Steve Rogers to baby Peter Parker need a night out, Thor and Loki babysits.


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**A/N Story was completely inspired by this piece of artwork I saw on tumblr ****_ post/24794112358/look-what-i-arted-today-this-is-what-happens-when_**** ,I showed it to a friend and I said this needs to be a fic, he said well write yourself, so I did, because I needed some schmoopy cuteness and besides who can ever say no to schmoop. On to the story..**

Little Peter Parker-Rogers-Stark, all eight months of him was the apple of his daddies eyes and so it only stood to reason that Tony and Steve was a little more than apprehensive in leaving their pride and joy with two Asgardians who at their own admittance had little to no job experience of babysitting. It all started when Natasha brought up how Tony and Steve had become those people who never go out since they had become parents.

"You guys have to get out when was the last time you had a night out huh on your own with other grown ups?" Natasha asked as she cooed at Peter from across the room. As kids go Peter was rather a unique case unlike other children his age Peter was half spider but like other children he too was made up entirely of cute.

"We don't need a night out do we Tony." Steve said as Peter began crawling up along the wall , yeah that was not weird at all. The kid had mastered that long before crawling on the floor and damned if his dad's were not impressed by it.

"Were doing great." Tony agreed pulling Peter from the wall like he was made out of bubblegum tough to lift off and very sticky.

"You guys are starting to talk to adults like they are babies." Natasha pointed out.

"That's nonsense." Steve whispered.

"Yesterday you wanted to wipe my noise." Clint added as proof that Tony and Steve had kind of lost the plot ever since becoming parents.

"And I apologized for that and…"

"Wipe. My. Nose Steven! You wanted to wipe my freaking nose how do you not see you have a problem?"

"We need to get out." Steve admitted and wondered when was the last time he had actually gone out alone without Peter and he couldn't even remember. He looked over at Tony who seemed as confused by the dilemma as he was.

"So whose going to take care of the heir to my throne?" Tony asked the rest of the Avengers in the room as he tried to hide the separation anxiety that was already eating away at his heart, he didn't want to do it, but dammit if Steve didn't look happy about a night out already.

"Uh us? You want us to take care of Peter?" Bruce asked pushing his glasses up from the bridge of his nose.

"Well maybe not you Bruce, no offense to you, you know, it's just the other guy I am worried about." Steve said ever politely hoping Bruce would not take it to heart and Bruce being the sweet guy he was shook it off immediately.

"None taken, for a change I am happy to have the other guy around." Bruce said unable to hide his relief. He had no experience in dealing with children and planned on keeping it that way.

"You know guys I would love to but I got this seminar I have to attend on…on um…" Natasha stumbled and she looked over at Clint for help.

"Oh yeah the seminar about that thing that Fury wanted us to attend on that stuff yeah, sorry guys me and…" Clint pointed at Natasha. " Are booked…"

"Until next month…" She added and Clint nodded with a poker face that screamed of false disappointment.

"You guys are the worst liars ever, specially trained spies my ass." Tony said and he looked over to the only two people left in the room, well not people left but there were the two Asgardians, who were gods no less. Thor and Loki looking his usual miserable as hell self and what was he even doing here? Tony thought of asking but knew Thor would start rambling something about Loki being misunderstood and yada, yada, yada not evil and frankly everyone was sick to death of hearing the testimonies from the gospel of Loki is not evil from Reverend Thor.

"My brother and I would gladly take care of the Spiderchild." Thor announced and Loki looked up at him with a what the hell look. It was the most alive Loki had looked all night.

"Your brother and you would most gladly not look after the Spiderchild!" Loki yelled.

"Shut up Loki." Thor ordered.

"Make me." Loki retaliated and the Avengers rolled their eyes one minute they were at each others throats the next they were deeply in love no wonder Odin drifted off into a convenient Odin sleep all the time, the lucky bastard Tony thought.

"I am sure we can find a good babysitter." Tony said.

"I am not leaving Peter with some strangers." Steve interjected.

"We are not strangers." Thor protested.

"But one of you is rather strange." Clint whispered under his breath which was still loud enough for Loki to hear and then the next minute there was a puff of smoke and where Clint had been there was a tiny yellow duck. Everyone stared at the duck who was jumping up and down quaking like crazy.

"Loki turn him back." Thor ordered.

"No."

"Loki!"

"Fine! But this is an improvement to the normal Barton." Loki snapped his fingers and Clint was restored to his usual self, he looked ready to fling himself at Loki but Natasha held him back.

"His just gonna do it again Clint let it go!"

"Listen to your boyfriend Clint." Loki said.

"So we have decided Loki and I shall take care of the Spiderchild." Steve and Tony looked at each other wondering when exactly had that decision been reached and before they could object Thor opened his arms toward Peter who went to Thor without any hesitation and that pretty much sold it.

"This was a bad idea." Steve said as evening approached way to quickly and it was time to leave for the restaurant.

"Aw how bad could it be?"

"Loki is one of the babysitter's." Steve whispered like maybe Tony could have forgotten that detail.

"Yeah that's not exactly a comforting thought is it but listen Thor is here and Peter loves Thor they'll be fine and we won't stay long right." Tony said calming Steve's nerves and he looked over to the two gods who looked very uncomfortable suddenly with the baby in their care.

"Okay guys instructions." Steve said.

"I have had children Steven long before you have I know what to do. Oh my children." Loki whispered his voice deep and heavy with nostalgia all he needed was a violin playing in the background to set the mood.

"Loki I swear to god you tell us that story one more time of how you gave birth and I will sew your mouth shut myself!"

"It was rather painful." Loki said not paying attention to what Tony had to say rather in love with his own story and the sound of his voice but mostly he loved the story because he knew the kind of effect it had on everyone who was not from Asgardian heritage especially Tony. "The labor was long and tiresome but Sleipnir was a beautiful baby." Tony and Steve were both soldiers had fought many creatures, had seen things that would give ordinary people sleepless nights, but no matter how many times they heard Loki's pregnancy stories it still made both of them want to scream and run around pulling their hair out by its ends.

"Thor." Steve said silently begging with Thor with that one word to please make his baby brother shut the hell up.

"His adopted." Thor whispered which was Thor's way of explaining every Loki mistake in the book.

"Okay we're going and no one is allowed to tell my child any stories of freaking horse pregnancies you got that?" Tony ordered

"I swear." Thor whispered solemnly and he nudged Loki in the side for him to agree to the terms and conditions as well but Loki's lips were sealed.

"I do what I want Tony." And Tony was going to go off about how he was going to kick Loki if he even dared but Steve laid a consoling hand on Tony's shoulder that said let it go and Tony just shook his head. Steve had been right this had been a really bad idea.

"Okay we better be going before we change our minds."Steve said giving Peter a lingering kiss on his forehead. "Pete you be a good boy for your Uncle Thor and Uncle Loki." Loki rolled his eyes and tried not laughing.

"We will only be gone for a few hours." Steve explained like Peter could understand.

"And somehow you are making it sound like you will never return." Loki said and Tony shot him a look before Tony could say it Loki did. "I know, I know Stark shut up Loki."

And it turned out to be the longest goodbye in the history of goodbyes, Steve kept remembering odd little things, like Peter didn't like it when he was alone, that both Asgardians should always keep an eye on him because he was getting a knack for crawling everywhere even on the ceiling, what Peter's favorite toy was and how Peter needed a lullaby to send him off to sleep.

"Leave now please just go!" Loki begged pushing them out of the front door and slamming it closed behind him.

"Thought they would never leave." Loki said. "Okay I am gonna take a nap."

"No you are not, you are helping me with Peter." Thor said and Loki looked like he was ready to kick Thor which was a constant look between the brothers.

It all went well for the first couple of hours, Peter was easily amused with toys that made loud noises and shone bright lights. He drank his bottle and was altogether a really pleasant little baby and Thor asked himself why had Tony and Steve been so worried in the first place. That was until Thor misplaced Peter.

"Loki I have lost the Spiderchild!" Thor screamed like perhaps the sky was in the process of falling.

"You what?"

"One minute he was in front of me and I turned my back and he was gone. Tony and Steve will not forgive me for this atrocity I have failed them brother. Failed!" Thor cried out he turned around gripping his head in his hands and there nestled in between the sheets of Thor's cape was Peter sweetly nestled and clinging on and looking mighty happy. Loki couldn't help but smile and he let Thor run around Stark towers for nearly an hour looking for the Spiderchild who was very much attached to his back.

Loki peeled Peter off from Thor's cape when it looked like Thor was about to really cry and there was no fun to be had when a grown assed god sheds tears.

"You have found him brother!" Thor shouted turning around as Peter now clung to Loki, taking huge clumps of the god of mischief's hair and tugging onto it hard.

"You are very welcome brother." Loki said proudly. "Thor no please don't!" Loki cried and then it was to late he found himself in a very tight and awkward embrace with Peter in the middle chewing on Loki's hair.

The phone rang saving Loki from the hug and he could breathe again as Thor answered it and there was no guessing who was on the other end of the line.

"He is fine…we are taking good care of him…you worry to much…enjoy yourself…bring me home one of those bags for dogs." Thor said to the phone and then put it down. Peter yawned.

"Ooh looks like someone is tired." Thor cooed holding Peter tighter and stroking his soft auburn hair.

"Thanks for noticing Thor can I go to bed now."

"Not you the Spiderchild…Steve said we should sing him a lullaby do you know a song?"

"Yes I do the lyrics go…_Thor is a bore who I try to ignore_…something, something...pain in my..."

"That is no song." Thor said smiling besides himself. "Mother used to sing us a song."

Loki raised his eyebrows.

"I remember nothing." He replied with disgust.

"You are lying brother. I can tell, there is no shame in remembering, not all our memories are bitter there are some good ones."

"Easy for you to say and still no, I do not recall any lullaby's." Loki shook his head and planted himself down on the couch he wondered what other villains were doing on a Saturday night surely they were not babysitting mutant children and hanging out with their idiotic big brothers. It dawned on Loki that he was a shameful villain, he thought suddenly of turning the street into ice cream just for the hell of it, he had an image to uphold after all. He listened to Thor sing softly and Loki remembered the lullaby all to well.

"Thor that is not how it goes." Loki shouted irritated.

"I thought you didn't remember." Thor whispered with a smug grin on his face.

"I don't…I…fine I remember it but just a little."

"You were a very small baby very much like Peter." Thor said planting a gentle kiss on Peter's soft skin.

"You don't know that."

"I know it as a fact, you cried a lot it was annoying and Mother would sing to you and you would be quiet immediately I asked if you were hurt if that was why you cried so much." Thor said full of melancholy.

"You are making this up you can't remember that."

"Who are you to say what I may or may not remember Loki? It's my memories… his not settling down think perhaps he misses his fathers?" Thor asked

"I think it has nothing to do with him longing for his fathers I think his not settling down because you have a terrible voice and also you are singing the song entirely wrong."

"Then please enlighten me." Loki felt somehow that he had been tricked. That it had been Thor's plan all along to get him to cooperate and help with Peter.

"I think you remember the words just fine Thor you can remember my childhood so well but you can hardly remember the words to a lullaby?"

"I am being honest." Loki looked at Thor it wasn't like Thor to lie he knew his brother well enough.

"The song goes…I can't believe I am actually doing this." Loki cursed.

"Just tell me how it goes." Thor persisted sitting down beside Loki on the couch. And Loki looked like he would never utter the words but he eventually gave in and grumbled under his breathe.

"Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket. Never let it fade away. Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket. Save it for a rainy day."

"Sing it." Thor insisted.

"That far and no further brother."

"Please." Loki rolled his eyes and then beside himself and so help him god he was going to have his ass thrown out of the league of villains for this, but so help him he began singing along. Singing along in the sweetest most gentle voice, a voice that Peter responded to, a voice that if you were not in the same room then you would never believe that it was Loki even singing it.

Loki reached out and stroked Peter's face. Peter's eyes grew heavy as Loki sang and Thor rocked him gently to sleep.

"His asleep." Thor said looking down at Peter who was resting against his chest, eyes closed and a thumb firmly lodged in his mouth.

"Thank goodness." Loki uttered trying to sound peeved but Thor saw right through it.

"You can argue all you want Loki but you like him."

"Shut up you big oaf before he wakes up again."

"Admit it." Thor said.

"Fine his cute." Loki admitted leaning his head back against the headrest. "Even though his fathers are complete and utter idiots." Thor smiled he took what he could get with Loki who held his emotions close to his chest. They sat quietly on the couch for the longest time listening to the soft breathing of Peter.

"Do you really remember when I was little?" Loki finally spoke.

"Yes."

"Tell me."

"I recall being told that you were my little brother and it was my job to take care of you, protect you I have never doubted or believed anything else since then."

"You always were an easy one to fool." Loki whispered.

"Some might say…thank you for helping me look after him." Thor waited for a wise crack remark the kind he was all to used to hearing but there was none. Thor looked over to see that Loki had fallen asleep. Thor smiled to himself and sleep quickly carried him away to.

They never heard Tony and Steve come around from their dinner. They never heard Steve's awww'ing as he stared at the two norse gods sleeping side by side with Peter safely tucked against Thor's broad chest. They never heard the click from Tony's camera as he took pictures of them. Blackmail like this did not deliver itself up to you every single day and Tony had to take advantage of it.

"Should we wake them?" Steve whispered prying Peter out of Thor's strong arms and the moment Peter was pulled away Loki leaned closer to Thor.

"Nah let them wake up and be awkward around each other, maybe we will get some peace and quiet around here." Tony said pulling a throw blanket across the two gods who looked rather content.

"They made good babysitters." Steve said.

"Surprising isn't it." Tony mused. "Hey I have an idea. How about in the morning when they wake up we tell them Peter is missing and its all their fault scare them a bit huh?"

"You are a mean man Mr Stark." Steve answered shaking his head.

"So that's a yes?"

"That's an I'll think about it." Steve said turning off the lights and leaving the sleeping gods behind with a smile.

* * *

_Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket_

_Never let it fade away_

_Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket_

_Save it for a rainy day_

_For love may come and tap you on the shoulder some starless night_

_Just in case you feel you want to hold her_

_You'll have a pocketful of starlight_

_For love may come and tap you on the shoulder some starless night_

_Just in case you feel you want to hold her_

_You'll have a pocketful of starlight _

_(Save it for a rainy, save it for a rainy, rainy, rainy, day) _

_For when your troubles start multiplyin' and they just might_

_It's easy to forget them without tryin'_

_With just a pocketful of starlight_

**A/N The lullaby above which Thor and Loki mention is one I nabbed from the series Lost as I am clueless to lullaby's, hope you enjoyed the story and thank you for reading. **


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